When to do it? :(

DiamondPuppy0809 · September 2012

I went on vacation for 11 days out of town an left my animals in the care of one of my friends. She's a busy girl but agreed that she'd be able to handle it. Molly, my eldest Rhodesian Ridgeback/Pit bull dog at 12 years old had accidents in the house while she was out (something she's only done once before, a long time ago). She's continued to do so now that we've gotten home. I don't blame my friend for not being home enough to let Molly out, but she is old, and can't wait forever. I was only gone two hours and Molly had been outside plenty before I left, but when I came back she had made a mess in our dining room. Now I'm not sure if Molly can't hold it very well anymore or she just doesn't want to wait. $:\$ I wrote down, in detail, all the things that my animals required while we were gone. My friend seemed to follow everything fairly well with no issues. But I noticed Molly wasn't able to get up or lie down very well, something that should be fine for her as long as she's given her arthritic medication twice a day. I questioned my friend about it and to my surprise, she had been giving Molly her meds. I checked the bottle and sure enough, at least 22 pills were gone. Her pain must be worse now, I don't know if she hurt herself while we were gone (she's extremely clumsy). She's always tripping over the stairs and almost falling, she's actually fallen a few times and we have stairs all over our house. She also seems pretty much 60% deaf at her age now and I'm always yelling her name or commands (or using hand signals) just to get her to hear and react. This also causes her to bark uncontrollably at pretty much nothing because she thinks she hears someone in our driveway or walking in the door, etc. It's difficult to calm her down sometimes. The last thing is that everyone - my mom, my dad, and my sister - almost can't stand her clumsiness and are constantly yelling at her to lie down while she's in the living room (we have hardwood floors and she has thick nails that make a lot of noise - they're clipped every two weeks). We can't keep her anywhere in the house without her tearing something apart and my mom refuses to try and train her to be kenneled by stating that, "she won't stay in a kennel, she'll get out somehow or hurt herself trying." I agree but I'd rather try than give up before we do. The reason we aren't allowed to keep her outdoors anymore (where she had an insulated dog house, food, water, toys, a big fenced yard) is because multiple neighbors have complained to the animal control that she barks consistently all day. We live in an area frequented by bears and cougars... she's always guarding her yard but recently it could be from the lack of hearing that makes her bark. So she must be inside, where she has accidents, tears items up, gets into the garbage (which we now prevent), or guards the bowl of dog food so that none of the other dogs can eat. (Max, our 6 year old dog lost weight while we were on vacation probably due to Molly's guarding, the food bowl was always full). I just don't know what to do if her pain is worsening. My mom won't take her to the vet for to ask how much longer until we should put her down (it's inevitable, she's a stubborn girl and I know her pain will force us to put her down eventually) so she's basically leaving the decision up to me as I'm the only one with a real connection to this dog. This will be the first dog I'll have to endure losing. Not the first pet, but I've been too young to be very effected by any previous losses. I almost never see Molly very happy anymore, she still plays with Max sometimes but not as often as she used to and she hasn't responded when I try to play with her anymore. She's always sulking because someone in the house has scolded her or made her lie down because her nails are too noisy. I've just recently noticed that she stands and stares at nothing a lot and her body starts to rock a bit. She also runs into our dryer and washer while the doors to them are closed. It also happens with couches, doors, and chairs that haven't been opened or moved. I looked up some of these behaviors and some seem related to "Senior Dementia" in dogs. The question is, do I wait to put her down or do I do it soon? I have to have a discussion with my parents still. But now that I'm back to school 6 hours a day along with my sister and parents being gone all that time too, I don't want to leave Molly alone all that time, especially if she can't control her bladder and bowel movements anymore. I don't think it's fair. I don't know what to do! ):

TiffaneeTerrorific · September 2012

The way your describing how Molly is acting is almost like a memory to when my dog Lucky was with us before we put him to sleep. He was getting pretty bad arthritis so we would give him medications, but it didn't seem like he was ever comfortable. He wasn't as motivated to get up.. A lot of the time we would have to use food to get him up to go outside. We had stairs to go outside so we would have to walk him up and down them otherwise he might of fallen. He wouldn't usually urinate in the house but he would defecate often. He was starting to loose his sight and he was just getting old. He would also do what you said molly is doing, looking into space and just kind of wobble in place. But, basically at one point you have to ask yourself and of course discuss it with your family, Is she suffering? She might have a good bed, food, family but is she in too much pain? I knew my dog Lucky was in pain because his arthritis was getting quite bad to where we needed to help him get around, and even though he never "looked" like he was in pain, we knew he was. It is a hard decision to make because they are pretty much family and when you have them for many years, you get attached. But, the best thing to do is to look into her well-being and make the decision based on that. What is best for Molly?

DiamondPuppy0809 · September 2012

I, personally, am leaning towards euthanising her just because of her pain and the fact she doesn't have much she looks forward to anymore. And at her rate of deterioration, she'll need to be put down possibly the middle of my school year and that'd be so hard. I want to be spending as much time with her before we do it instead of focusing on homework and ignoring her. My sister refuses to accept this which is making it harder on me because she keeps telling my dog, out loud, "Nope, we're not doing it yet, Molly." Obviously Molly can't understand but it upsets me to hear her say something like that when I needed to make the decision. ): I don't know if my mom's going to make the appointment soon, all I know is it's going to be one of the hardest days of my life. As much trouble as Molly has caused in her 12 years, she's still the first dog I've ever loved.

Alabama · September 2012

Deciding when it's time to let an older companion go is hard at the best of times. I usually make that decision shortly after I start asking myself if it's time. If I'm questioning their pain, their quality of life, for me it means it's time. I love my animals, they are part of my family and since they can't tell me how much pain they're in, if I know they are in pain and the pain meds don't see to be effective anymore, it's time. I've been incredibly lucky and haven't had to make that decision often. My pets have generally passed quietly, on their own. One of the most heart wrenching sights I experienced, more so than animals that had been abused, happened at Alex's first vet visit. There was an extremely elderly retriever waiting with his owner to go back for boarding. The poor old guy was skin and bones, couldn't hardly sit, let alone stand. Yet, the owner, when she checked him, in told them under no circumstance were they to euthanize him though he was 15 years old. He had to have a special food, which the owner provided because he couldn't process food properly any longer. She had cream for the pressure sores caused by the lack of fat or muscle to cushion bones. He was a very friendly dog, wagging his tail at us and attempting to get closer. I could tell by the tone of his owner's voice that she obviously loved him. All I could think was I hope he passes while at the vet's office. There comes a point when no matter how loving or how happy a pet is to see you, it's time to stop the suffering they live with constantly. Someone purposely cruel is horrible, but for me, it's just as bad when the owner loves an animal and is unintentionally cruel by not considering their pain and well being.

DiamondPuppy0809 · September 2012

We're making an appointment for Tuesday to have it done. ):

TiffaneeTerrorific · September 2012

If you ever need someone to talk to, you are free to send me a pm.

DiamondPuppy0809 · September 2012

Tiffanee Terrorific wrote:

If you ever need someone to talk to, you are free to send me a pm.

Thanks, Tiff.

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When to do it? :(

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