The Reality of kids who tease...

Signa · October 2010

My husband, some friends and I went to the state fair last night. Our friends' daughter came along and she began talking to me about my height. She is tall as well probably about 5'6 and she's in 5th or 6th grade. I am 5'11 so I am definately on the tall side. XP She was telling me how she was being teased in school because of her height. It really upset me to see such a young and beautiful little girl feeling ashamed and slouching because a couple of jerks in her class that decided it would be funny to pick on the tall girl. I began to tell her my experience in school. I was never ashamed of my height because I did a lot of modeling from 5th grade until I was about 16. I was always being praised for being tall so I had plenty of confidence about it. However I do remember one incident that upset me when I was a kid. I was in 6th grade and had a huge crush on the elementary school heart throb. Like every other little girl I was gaga over him and one day he began to approach me. I was so excited but when he got there I realized that the situation wasn't what I thought it was going to be. He came up to me and began to call me a big balooga, whatever that means. I remember hiding in the bathroom and crying my eyes out until the end of lunch. I know pretty sad right but the story gets better. About 5 years later I was in my sophmore year in high school and homecoming was creeping up. That same jerk who called me a big balooga asked me to homecoming and I laughed in his face. He was rejected hard I told him sorry but the big balooga would rather go with her dog than go with him. The guy turned bright red and took off completely embarrassed. So moral of the story, if you are ever teased, jerks get what they deserve. I guarentee that eventually it will come back to bite them in the butt.

Shibagirl · October 2010

Oh the joy of karma XD I'm short.. About 5'2" and probably not growing anymore, but I LOVE it

Signa · October 2010

Cheers to those of us who enjoy who we are. XD

Kazuko · October 2010

Beluga is a type of whale? But yeah, high school kids are jerks. Rule of thumb. I was picked on a lot for wearing glasses. Kids called me Harry Potter for YEARS. From 4th grade at one school, carried on to Freshman year of high school, until a guy in the lunch line nudged his friend and said "Hey, there's Harry Potter!" and his friend asked "Why do you call her that?" "Doesn't she look like him?" "...No?" and ever since then, no one called me that. xD I was made fun of for lotsa other things (being short, being skinny, looking rather boyish because I was skinny, if you catch my meaning) but it got to the point where you learn to just roll with the punches. I'd even -give- them a reason to make fun of me (wearing dog collars, cosplaying to school, etc) until it turned out that I ended up with more friends than most of the bullies because I have the bad habit of getting along with everyone, once they give me a chance. xD

Signa · October 2010

If he was refering to a whale then that proves that he had a lack of intelligence I was a beanpole. >< Funny that you mention collars and whatnot that same year I ended up going with a guy who wore the bizarre things ever. For example one year he made a jacket out of skittles wrappers. People looked at me like I was a nut but I didn't care because he was the one of the most ginuine people I have ever known. I've always loved people who would rather be themselves then run with the crowd. Harry Potter...how original XP.

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Im emberessed to admit this, so no mean comments but I used to be a bully, actully very recently. Sometimes kids make it seem as they dont mind, or you find it so funny your blinded, and dont relize how much it hurts. Well theres this kid-always in trobule, grabbing attention, i cant explain him! Hes insane. His name is Saleh, so we made a day called "shun saleh" and ignore him, and we'd stick our fist up if someone tryed to even look at him. Well we sit next to eachother in L.A (assigned seats) and we had a long, genuine talk, I dont wanna go in details, but people need to open there eyes. I now am the only non particpate of shun saleh day, and the only one willing to get near him with out saying "fatmama" wich is his moms name. Im not defending bullys what so ever, im ashamed, Im just giving you a look into something. Sometimes you honestly dont relize your hurting someone, you think they think its funny or something. Sometimes the victom even acts along, and dosent admit there hurt, wich just encouages you. Im not talking about people who flat out go "Your ugly, your fat" not those kind of bullys, the humor bullys I chould say. Like theres a kid me and friend used to go "Your so hott, your my bff, and wed hug him, and ask if his mom ever beat him" and the poor kid, Im so glad ive changed. Its only been a couple of months, but like I said no mean comments. And yes im so ashamed.

Signa · October 2010

Tousor- I am really glad that you were able to realize the damage that bullying can do. It is often people shrug off what they say or do and don't realize the hurt they cause. Many people don't realize the rip they can put on a person's self esteem until its too late. I had a best friend in the eigth grade who I basically lived with. We were inseprable. She lived with her single mother and her stepdad who was an alchoholic and was constantly attacking her. She would get into fights easily and was always in trouble due to her lack of support at home. She was slightly overweight and got teased about it but would blow it off like it didn't hurt. She would act really tough but when we got home she would break down. I was the only support she had and was the only one who understood her pain. Needless to say I got into some trouble at school and was expelled. So I was forced to go to a different school and was unable to see and visit her as often as I would have liked. We talked on the phone but my friend became extremely depressed. Finally one day she lost it. Somebody made a rude comment to her at school and then she came home to her verbally abusive step dad. I got an awful phone call with her expressing suicidal thoughts. I talked to her a while but ignored the suicide threats thinking it was just depression talking. A few hours later I recieved a phone call from her mother, she was dead. I didn't forgive myself for years. It just goes to show the slightest thing can push somebody over the edge so watch what you say. There are too many people who have more than just bullying in school, so don't add to it, or you may end up living with something extreme on you concious forever.

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Im sorry about your friend. I hurt so bad when I hear those storys, even I wasnt as mean as some of the people are to victoms of suicide. Its abosltuley horrible, people, even bullys, should know when its gone to far. In a way- they are a murderer. Im not saying its right to kill your self, in my opninion, I dont quite understand it, but some times peple arent themselves. Lets say Jane was bullied- when she killed herself, she wasnt in the mind set of Jane. And the reason being, is the bullyier, they-killed-someone. Flat.

Young_Native · October 2010

It's not always like that Totouser. Said Jane, she could have already felt bad about herself and the bullies just fuel it. Bullies do a lot of things that were already deep wounds in a person. They press it even more like a salted probe and keep pushing it until they feel satisfied and happy to hurt another person and make them cry. It's human to hate and hurt someone else. It's actually instinct of survival of the best, but...we're NOT animals. We should never give into those tainted desires just because it makes you feel better and pushes someone to the end. It's the worse part when they're near the edge because once they believe life isn't good, you'll have a heck of a lot to do to make them think otherwise. Bullies usually are arrogant. Totally arrogant and are high on themselves, they usually strike out because a certain person doesn't think the bully is that awesome like how the bully sees themselves. It's usually never about a bully being troubled at home. It's just them being animals. Beasts that don't know when to stop. Kids who tease probably have been teased themselves. There's usually no cure until they figure it on their own or decide they want to stop. Bullies are the fire to the fuel that was already in the person. It's sick to think people bully the other person to suicide. It's a sad thing. The small pleasure the person gets for teasing another can't make up or compare to the pain it brings and the permanent wounds that'll stay through their life. I agree with Signa, I hope everything they did does come back and bite them in the butt. That's finally and the only thing bullies actually deserve. Totouser, I'm glad you stopped bullying and realized the pain that it brought.

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Young_Native wrote:

It's not always like that Totouser. Said Jane, she could have already felt bad about herself and the bullies just fuel it. Bullies do a lot of things that were already deep wounds in a person. They press it even more like a salted probe and keep pushing it until they feel satisfied and happy to hurt another person and make them cry. It's human to hate and hurt someone else. It's actually instinct of survival of the best, but...we're NOT animals. We should never give into those tainted desires just because it makes you feel better and pushes someone to the end. It's the worse part when they're near the edge because once they believe life isn't good, you'll have a heck of a lot to do to make them think otherwise. Bullies usually are arrogant. Totally arrogant and are high on themselves, they usually strike out because a certain person doesn't think the bully is that awesome like how the bully sees themselves. It's usually never about a bully being troubled at home. It's just them being animals. Beasts that don't know when to stop. Kids who tease probably have been teased themselves. There's usually no cure until they figure it on their own or decide they want to stop. Bullies are the fire to the fuel that was already in the person. It's sick to think people bully the other person to suicide. It's a sad thing. The small pleasure the person gets for teasing another can't make up or compare to the pain it brings and the permanent wounds that'll stay through their life. I agree with Signa, I hope everything they did does come back and bite them in the butt. That's finally and the only thing bullies actually deserve. Totouser, I'm glad you stopped bullying and realized the pain that it brought.

I ment for people who always thought no matter what, they whouldnt go that far. People who where relgious mabey? Also most of the time being teaed themselves isnt always the case for bullys. As I stated above, I used to be one. I was never picked on, nor was the people who pitched in. I also agree, I hope everyone whos bullied someone that bad, cant sleep for years.

Young_Native · October 2010

Most people don't believe they won't got that far, but one day think of it and find it crazy. Next day, they find it the solution and do it. Nobody believes at first they'd kill themselves. It sounds absolutely crazy, but you have to be crazy or in enough pain/misery to do it.

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Mmh o.O Never thought about it that way /: Thats just sickening. Absoltuley sickening. I dont remeber the correct number but in a magazine somehwere it said about 4k kids commited suicide in a month. Dear god, please help humantiy!

tarnish · October 2010

I just have to say that I am quite disturbed by what you've said you've done totouser. The thing is, you may have changed, but the people who had to hear and deal with it will -never- forget it. No one ever forgets if they have been teased. I remember incidents from preschool! And you can even use signa as an example. As she said, this happened to her in 6th grade and shes older and married and still remembers. I just hope that you really have learned and maybe even try to -prevent- the teasing and not just watch it happen.

Its abosltuley horrible, people, even bullys, should know when its gone to far.

There shouldn't be anything in the first place to go far. People need to treat people with respect. Signa: Im glad it got switched for you and it worked out. Im sure you got a lot of satisfaction from that.

Young_Native · October 2010

Sickening? What's sickening is what happened to that person to make them do that. It is sad, Totouser, but I think sickening is a little hurtful to say. I know my fair share of people who've tried to kill themselves, most are still alive and are amazing people, and I'm one of those fair share, though I might not be amazing. God can't help humanity. Humanity has to help themselves. We have to change our individual selves before we can make others change for the best. I will stop now before I get too carried away. XP

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Young_Native wrote:

Sickening? What's sickening is what happened to that person to make them do that. It is sad, Totouser, but I think sickening is a little hurtful to say. I know my fair share of people who've tried to kill themselves, most are still alive and are amazing people, and I'm one of those fair share, though I might not be amazing. God can't help humanity. Humanity has to help themselves. We have to change our individual selves before we can make others change for the best. I will stop now before I get too carried away. XP

No its sickening that people whould treat someone that bad. Like I said, even I wasnt that bad. And Tarnish, yes Ive thought about all of that, I know I cant fix it with a flip of a switch, but 1. Ive had long talks with the very few people I picked on. 2. It wasnt the kind of bullying we are talking about. Infact I never actully directed a mean comment toward them, In fact I can only think of one person who didint derserve it, and it wasnt extreme, and were good friends now. When I say didnt deserve it, I mean alot of the people where bullys as well, but to the extreme like telling people to kill themselves, and Id be like "Wow get a friend, and then you can talk", wich I consider bullying, because its picking on there soical life. The example at the beginning of this post is sort of an example, accept it was more mean on my side to. The person Saleh is rude, and plain annoying. He calls girls rotten names, practically molest them, touching there bottoms and such, and is always swearing at teachers. Also "shun saleh" actully ment ignore him, wich even though its plain mean, in a way its for the best. On top of that he started the "fatmamah" thing, even though it went way to far. Im not justifying anything ive done what so ever, I just dont want people to think im that bully that tells peple to kill them selves, or calls people ugly. I was one who made comments, unnecsary ones. I actully saw a school counseler after I relized how mean I was, and she said I really wasnt a bully, I make mean comments, but im not the deffintion of a bully. Its just my opinion I abviosyl should have kept to my self. And back to Native, I agree. God cant help lol, wich stinks /: I was sort of being sarcastic, but sort of now though. Its just some people dont look deeply into things.

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

Just re-read your post tarn, and I toatally mis read id. I see what your saying. Indeed I know this, I do. I feel horrible about it to, I wish I chould start all over. Its weight on my shoulders that will always be there, no matter what, it will come back when I talk to my kids about bullying, or graduating high school. Thanks for saying it so kindly, and im sorry I just like exploded at you, I toatally misread it and I had a bad day. Any further comments from other people who dont know how to say it so maturley keep it to your self though,because im already a tad frazzled from hers, even though she did nothing wrong. It was me, Im just reflecting

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

What kind of bullying takes place in high school, just curious? Im a little younger, so bullying in my eyes isnt as extreme

Signa · October 2010

As for my experience, as young was saying there were many things built up in my friend's life that caused her to make that decision. She lacked support at home and couldn't find the correct help she needed to pull herself out of depression. In her mind it seemed as if she felt it was the only way out. She had my support all the way but really I was 14 at the time so I really wasn't enough to help her. As far as comments and whatnot go, the comment that was made to her was rude but it really wasn't an extreme bash or anything. It just was the cherry to her cake, she lost it. You may not think that the things you say are that mean but truely it can be worse than you think. Like you were saying tousor tarn's comment bothered you and you exploded because of a bad day. Same goes for people with depression issues and whatnot. For instance my friend had troubles at home and when somebody decided to say something rude to her it really scarred her. Like her thought process was probably something like this, "I already get treated bad enough at home why do people treat me bad at school too?" I mean I really can't speak for her but from what she told me it just killed her inside when people would say things to her because she was already upset. Emotions can be fueled really easily. Back to me, I honestly don't think what I said to that guy was mean. He knew exactally wh I felt the way I felt about him. I didn't ever attack a person based on looks or who they were. I just simply stated a fact, I would've much rather taken my dog than him because a person who thinks they can rip at somebody's self esteem like that is somebody I choose not to be around. Bullying in high school can consist of many things. Generally it gets pretty vicious. I saw a kid getting beaten up for a personal prefrence who he dated. Luckily for the poor guy a friend of mine stepped in and threw the guys off of him while I called the cops. The kid took off before the cops ever got there. It was really sad that the guy didn't even feel like he could tell the cops what happened. It was a downright hate crime. Now that is something that I find sickening. The most kind of "bullying" I had in high school were girls who stabbed me in the back and talked about me. Which is pretty common and it never really bothered me because I just cut them off after they decided to be rude. Most of my friends were pretty good to me and I never had problems with the quote on quote popular crowd because I was never interested in hanging out with them. Many high school kids are downright mean though. Please note that my main point in this post is just to let people know that there are other people out there who have experienced bullying and that most of the bullies get what they deserve. So if anybody ever has a problem and is upset about something my pm box is always open. Feel free to drop me a note if there is anything anybody needs to talk about.

Shibagirl · October 2010

I am going to totally change the subject here, before this gets out of hand lol.. Beluga is a funny word. XD But I love beluga whales.

Signa · October 2010

Lol newf loves me! hahaha XP

tarnish · October 2010

I just think of the song about the belugas. xD

Shibagirl · October 2010

Haha yes! Baby Beluga in the deep blue sea... Swam so wild and he swam so free... I don't remember the rest

Lonleycarrots · October 2010

I adore belugas! I have a very fond memory of 5th grade about balugas, that brings back the good 'ol days (;

Howdy, Stranger!

The Reality of kids who tease...

Comments