You know how it feels when your life has been just one bad thing after another? And then when it finally settles down and you can breathe again the worst happens. My life has has been turned upside down countless times in the past year. Two of my dreams that I've held onto for years were shattered. Someone I thought was my best friend turned out to be a viper. What I thought was true turned out to be a big fat lie. I finally got everything to calm down and things have been really nice and peaceful the last few weeks are now ruined again. My migraines are getting bad again to the point I've blacked out a couple times and almost blacked out a few. Probably going to have to get another MRI to make sure the two cysts in my head haven't gotten bigger or moved. I just want things to stop always getting worse. I need normal right now and it's no where in sight. The people closest to me think i'm doing a bad job with my desired career choice and small every day choices. I'm me not you. I know what I want and I will go for it. I've had to learn how to hide my true feelings and pretend like everythings ok while I feel like I'm dying on the inside. And the funny thing is. I'm one of those people who my friends say has everything easy. Ya right. <br>I'm just tired of always having to guard against getting hurt or keeping it all together. I give up so much for the ones I love yet half the time they don't even notice. I want to be able to lean on someone else for once. Not have to be tough or know all the answers. Is that too much to ask really? I try to never lean on others if it's not needed so when I say something Im really hurting. <br><br>I want to live my life the way I feel I need to. I'm not your average girl nor do I want to be. I just want respect and love like anyone else. Don't bash me for my beliefs or family. Trust is needed in life. Without trust you have nothing. <br><br>*cookies to all who read*. I've had more then my share of crap and I'm starting to fall.
Comments