Michael Phelps = Chuck Norris?

<span style="font-size:75">Haha, this was on a friends blog on a site I cannot mention...<br><br>Michael Phelps can walk on water but doesn't want to show off, so he swims instead.<br><br>When Aquaman needs help he calls Michael Phelps.<br><br>Michael Phelps cashed his plane ticket in and swam Butterfly to the Olympics.<br><br>Michael Phelps arrived in China riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels. <br><br>Michael Phelps craps out Energizer batteries.<br><br>Michael Phelps is the only person in the world that can race a speed boat.... and win!<br><br>Michael Phelps doesn't swim through the water... the water swims around him.<br><br>The only thing that can defeat Michael Phelps is another Michael Phelps.<br><br>Michael Phelps qualified with a top speed of 378 mph at the Daytona 500, swimming! <br><br>Michael Phelps doesn't have a condo in Ann Arbor, he has a cave in the Atlantic.<br><br>One time, at band camp, Michael Phelps slept with all the women.... in one night.<br><br>Touch pads reach for Michael Phelps.<br><br>Michael Phelps was hungry before a race and ate his competition.<br><br>When you say "no one's perfect", Michael Phelps takes this as a personal insult. <br><br>Michael Phelps only swims through the water because he considers walking on top of it too pretentious<br><br>Michael Phelps can swim through dry land.<br><br>Michael Phelps doesn't swim with sharks. The sharks swim with him.<br><br>Michael Phelps eats whole cows for breakfast and then washes them down with Gatorade.<br><br>Michael Phelps sleeps underwater with one eye open. <br><br>The First rule of Michael Phelps is: you do not talk about Michael Phelps.<br><br>Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Michael Phelps for weight lifting tips.<br><br>Michael Phelps is the reason why Ian Thorpe went into retirement.<br><br>Michael Phelps will single handedly save NBC's poor summer ratings.<br><br>Michael Phelps' pulse is measured on the richter scale.<br><br>Michael Phelps can swim butterfly backwards and still beat his own world records.<br><br>There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Michael Phelps. <br><br>Michael Phelps once kicked a shark in the head... Its descendants are known today as the Hammer Head.<br><br>Michael Phelps doesn't wear a watch and he never is late, in fact is always arrives in world record time.<br><br>Michael Phelps recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.<br><br>Some swimmers use drag suits in practice... Michael Phelps uses a lead suit.<br><br>Michael Phelps was what Willis was talkin' about.<br><br>Michael Phelps can sneeze with his eyes open... underwater!<br><br>Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Michael Phelps pajamas.<br><br>Michael Phelps built the Beijing Aquatic Center (The Cube) 30 minutes before his first race</span>