Creative Writing.

DoodleBugHolding · February 2008

Realization Love is but a Disease, spreading from one person to another. Affecting people in its path without sympathy. Merciless on what it will cause to fragile and even healthy hearts. The victims, blinded by its futile lies. What a cruel emotion it seems. People searching for it as if it were the Holy Grail. Some try to toy with it, manipulating it and using it to their own foul advantage. But it only seems like a good idea until you are also in its grasp. It sly feeling of goodness creeps over you until like a Beautiful rose it pricks you. Making you bleed, making your heart slowly break and shatter. Destroying the trust and loyalty you had left. You no longer know who you are, who you used to be. Sooner or later you wish you never went out searching for it. *Even if you think this is horrible please do not steal.* Post comments please.

LarkPash · February 2008

Doodle_Bug wrote:

Realization Love is but a Disease, spreading from one person to another. Affecting people in its path without sympathy. Merciless on what it will cause to fragile and even healthy hearts. The victims, blinded by its futile lies. What a cruel emotion it seems. People out searching for it as if it were the Holy Grail itself. Some try to toy with it, manipulating it and using it to their own foul advantage. But it only seems like a good idea till you are also in its grasp. It sly feeling of goodness creeps over you until like a Beautiful rose it pricks you. Making you bleed, making your heart slowly break and shatter. Destroyed the trust and loyalty you had left. You no longer know who you are, who you use to be. Sooner or later you wish you never went out searching for it. *Even if you think this is horrible please do not steal.* Post comments please.

I would change it to "People search for it as if it were the Holy Grail" because underneath you use "toy with it". If you had toying with it then searching would fit better, but in all honesty I think keeping it "search" and "toy" is probably the most grammatical. "till" is not really a proper word. I'd change that to "until" or perhaps " 'til " if you want to keep it in that wording. "destroyed" would probably be better as "destroying" and "who you use to be" should be "who you used to be". Sounds very nice though. You must have put a lot of thought into it. If you didn't...then you fooled me.

DoodleBugHolding · February 2008

Thank you for your input. It does sound much better

I edited it. Actually I just thought it off the top of my mind. I was somewhat in a sad mood though, just felt like describing my view of love.

Howdy, Stranger!

Creative Writing.

Comments